I watched the veil of the great structure crumble
As men labored with hammers
Listening to the repetition
Finding a pattern
Of concealed disrepair
Knowing the proud colossus will fall
A second time into the sea
sounds like a failed cultural construct like a marriage or on a larger scale a community or society, but since it is going to fall into the sea again, it could very well be a failed second marriage or a marriage that was saved but only on the outside, because the real problems were never addressed - only concealed. Alternately the structure could also be someone proud who has a problem. He seeks help through therapy but keeps repeating his destructive pattern on the side. The protagonist seems to be a child in both cases. I am confused by your use of the past tense in most of the poem and then the future tense in the last line, which means that the collossus still hasn't fallen even though the story took place in the past. What I'm saying is, that I would probably use the past tense all the way through, as the verbal form "would" can also denote future tense.
Would might have been a better choice, but I went with a more colloquial phrasing attempting to make it seem as though the structure is falling as they repair it.
It's about the crumbling infrastructure of this country. We don't have the money to rebuild our bridges and buildings, so we try to get by with cheap repairs knowing eventually, it will all fail catastrophically. It's as hopeless as if someone were to attempt to pull the Colossus at Rhodes upright and attempt repairs. It's just going to fall down again. So also it the American way of life. We plan in months and years, not decades and centuries and so, for all of our post WW2 wealth, we have nothing permanent to show for it. In our arrogance, we've squandered our entire way of life and it is primed and ready to fail catastrophically.
Also, the hammers line is something most people wouldn't recognize, but when workers repair concrete structures, they tap the entire structure with hammers and mark the places that sound hollow. I find that to be an interesting metaphor.
It is an interesting metaphor. I grew up next to contruction sites and used to play there among skeletons of newly erected concrete walls. My father is a bricklayer, and in the 80s he helped build most of the town I grew up in as it expanded at rapid pace.
I saw a disturbing documentary last night about America about how an estimated 50 mio. people are now poor and 1 mio. children do not have a regular home because their parents have lost their homes due to unemployment, poor health and no medical plan. I know that it is easy for us to point fingers a you for not taking care of the weak, we have built our whole society around a tax funded model from the beginning, but you seem to have a strong point in your criticism of your government's tendency to address long term issues with short term plans. Watching your collossal economy crumble - even from across the Atlantic - is very frightening btw...
sounds like a failed cultural construct like a marriage or on a larger scale a community or society, but since it is going to fall into the sea again, it could very well be a failed second marriage or a marriage that was saved but only on the outside, because the real problems were never addressed - only concealed. Alternately the structure could also be someone proud who has a problem. He seeks help through therapy but keeps repeating his destructive pattern on the side. The protagonist seems to be a child in both cases.
ReplyDeleteI am confused by your use of the past tense in most of the poem and then the future tense in the last line, which means that the collossus still hasn't fallen even though the story took place in the past. What I'm saying is, that I would probably use the past tense all the way through, as the verbal form "would" can also denote future tense.
Would might have been a better choice, but I went with a more colloquial phrasing attempting to make it seem as though the structure is falling as they repair it.
ReplyDeletewas my analysis totally off track?
ReplyDeleteIt's about the crumbling infrastructure of this country. We don't have the money to rebuild our bridges and buildings, so we try to get by with cheap repairs knowing eventually, it will all fail catastrophically. It's as hopeless as if someone were to attempt to pull the Colossus at Rhodes upright and attempt repairs. It's just going to fall down again. So also it the American way of life. We plan in months and years, not decades and centuries and so, for all of our post WW2 wealth, we have nothing permanent to show for it. In our arrogance, we've squandered our entire way of life and it is primed and ready to fail catastrophically.
ReplyDeleteAlso, the hammers line is something most people wouldn't recognize, but when workers repair concrete structures, they tap the entire structure with hammers and mark the places that sound hollow. I find that to be an interesting metaphor.
ReplyDeleteIt is an interesting metaphor. I grew up next to contruction sites and used to play there among skeletons of newly erected concrete walls. My father is a bricklayer, and in the 80s he helped build most of the town I grew up in as it expanded at rapid pace.
ReplyDeleteI saw a disturbing documentary last night about America about how an estimated 50 mio. people are now poor and 1 mio. children do not have a regular home because their parents have lost their homes due to unemployment, poor health and no medical plan.
I know that it is easy for us to point fingers a you for not taking care of the weak, we have built our whole society around a tax funded model from the beginning, but you seem to have a strong point in your criticism of your government's tendency to address long term issues with short term plans.
Watching your collossal economy crumble - even from across the Atlantic - is very frightening btw...